Month: October 2008

That deep rattle of a smokers cough when you can hear the fluid in their throat and lungs vibrate. It makes me want to clear my throat when I hear it and more so makes me wonder why the hell anyone would want to own it. I don’t know if this is common in every smoker or if it’s something that is acquired from years of smoking but it sounds like death and gives me the pre vomit mouth waters to hear that gurgle.

A person I know has this cough and it’s gone beyond the typical smokers cough. All I can think of when she coughs is having a mouthful if phlegm.  She coughs almost constantly and it drives me up the wall making me want to scream. Her sides must hurt from the constant beating they get and I wonder if she’s really sick with a lung infection or worse. I feel really bad for the person who sits right next to her having to listen to this gurgling rumble of the almost constant coughing. What’s worse is watching her step outside for a smoke break.

Smoke up Johnny!

My almost no work-flow here isn’t anything new but I swear I’ve never been so bored in my life. Sitting here night after night for hours with absolutely nothing to do is really the norm but with less than two weeks to go each night seems like a week, I can’t believe it’s only Wednesday.

I’ve surfed the entire internet these past few months. I keep looking for something interesting that will occupy a good amount time like a flash game to get addicted to. Imagine what I could have accomplished all this time if I had something productive to work at.

I tried to do some riddles but I’m not smart enough and want to punch the monitor.

I’ve never been the social type able to approach Joe blow and strike up anything remotely resembling a conversation. My words with strangers are limited to a hey, or if I’m feeling talkative, perhaps a "how’s it going" or something else three words or less. I’m pretty sure that’s fine with most people or at least that’s all I want from them. It’s pathetic I know but somehow I feel put off by people in general and would rather avoid them than pretend to be interested. This is a sad way to exist and I’m embarrassed at the way I view people because really I do like the idea of being outgoing and willing to listen to random facts even if they are useless random facts. It’s not that I think I’m better than other people but I just have a hard time connecting. I’m sure that makes me a social outcast or just an asshole.

This isn’t limited to strangers either as I don’t even know most of my neighbors. I don’t know how it is with most people but I imagine normal people know several others on their block or surrounding neighborhood, maybe that’s not the case. Thinking back at the places I’ve lived as an adult I don’t think I ever knew more than a couple people on my block and even they probably introduced themselves to me. Just a couple days ago I noticed a lady right across the street from me is a member of a business group I meet with every week and I didn’t even recognize her all those months. I probably would have never even noticed at all were it not for another member of this group telling me "Jane” lived on my street.  I still haven’t said anything to her because I don’t feel like talking about what a coincidence it is.

The guy across the street from me seems quiet and I never see him outside chatting it up with the neighbors. I wonder if he doesn’t have the time or perhaps he’s just shy. Or maybe he doesn’t want to be bothered. He reminds me of a childhood friend, kind of nerdy but probably funny in a dark humor kind of way. I wonder how he would respond if I decided to go up to him and introduce myself. His wife is Asian so perhaps I could break the ice with an Asian joke.

With the Halloween parties coming up, time was running out so I had to find something fast. Unfortunately in my haste I may have picked something unknown to most people. Anyone who spends a good amount of time online will know about raptor jesus but the few people I told about it have no idea what I’m talking about. Hopefullyy at least a few people will know Raptor Jesus .

It’s not often I get an opportunity to look down into a chimney. Typically this is out of reach but today I was able to pull myself up and look in.

Perfect blend of heat and flavor for me. For the past couple months I’ve been craving hot food beyond what I would normally want. Franks Red Hot is still my all time favorite for it’s flavor but sriracha sauce is my current desire.

I’m sure everyone has received the Nigerian email scams claiming excessive amounts of money available to you in return for your cooperation. Perhaps some of you know about the site, 419Eater,  where people post accounts, which sometimes includes photos and sound files, with 419 scammers in an attempt to waste their time and resources. It’s quite fascinating but the reading is long and requires a good amount of your time.

It’s down to my last three weeks at "the bank" and I’m feeling nervous as ever. Actually less than three weeks with Oct. 31 being my last night. The first wave of employees let go were allowed to go home after only about two hours at work so I’m hoping that will be the case with us too. I keep putting off cleaning out my desk, not that I have a ton of stuff to take home, but I don’t want to have a box of things on my last day. I’ve always hated the idea of boxing my crap up and taking the walk out on the last day of work. Everyone knows our jobs are being sent out of state and over seas but still I want to walk out on that last day with what I came in with on that day.

I’m excited about being home at night but not sure how I will handle nights at home, it’s been a long time since I’ve not had that "me" time so it will take some getting used to. Of course I’m also worried about business with the hit and miss way things have been going. I keep telling myself it will be better but I also know I need to make things happen, I’m so damn lazy lately.

I’ve never taken the kids out to collect candy, being  at work during that time, so this year I plan to help them get dressed up and take them around the block. I’m thinking homemade costumes like zombies and such which would require only minimal makeup and old clothes.

The past few days have been beautiful with some unseasonably warm weather and sunshine. I love it but I’m reminded of the cold weather on the way when the night comes and temperatures drop way down. Today will be a high of 68F with a low of 43F. That’s one of the things about Michigan weather I hate, the dramatic change in temperature. Yesterday was a high of 83F with the sun blazing down which felt and energizing. We kept a couple kids home and went to Greenfield Village, my new favorite place, for a couple of hours. With a family pass we can visit as often as we want and I believe it’s open all year although I don’t know how enthusiastic I will be about walking around the village on snow covered streets. I find the history of the various attractions to be fascinating and given the time would be happy to spend hours at this place. I took plenty of photos and intend to upload some here soon. Unfortunately I can no longer access LJ at work which is why I don’t post much anymore, not that I have a significant number of readers.

Six weeks ago we got a puppy, a photo of him is posted in an earlier blog, named Otis who’s gotten so big in these past couple weeks. Not big like a big dog but considering we could hold him in the palm or our hands at first he’s grown dramatically. I’d say he’s around seven pounds now and a constant source of amusement. Seriously he’s like a little kid always needing our attention and getting into trouble. That was one of the things that prevented us from wanting a dog for a long time, not wanting another thing requiring so much attention but we love him for it.

Just arrived at work and out of habit I checked my LJ account just in case. Strange I am able to access it once again here.